It seems my recent announcement of wacom-woerity has sparked a wave of ACTUAL EMAILS! Oh yes yes people, long gone are the days of me having to MAKE UP my readers questions and then answer them myself while leaving everyone somewhat confused and feeling silly.

Unfortunately my joy is somewhat diminished by the whole “these emails being from people I actually know” thing as apposed to “lesbians who want me now” (I really miss that spam….it was so much better than the BUY RISING COCK STOCK NOW! I’m treated to on a daily basis lately) however beggars can only be choosers when it comes to what kind of genital herpes they’ll catch from the neighborhood cat named Susan, and I’m going for the long lasting kind that leaves you with a familiar tingle in your naughty bits long into retirement.

I don’t really know what the point of that last paragraph was.

People apparently want information about my life. I say apparently because I can’t imagine any one HONESTLY giving two craps in a pear tree about whether I got hit by a flying saucer (I’m talking the – far more deadly and EXISTANT – kitchen variety) last week or not. So I’ll give you guys what you’re asking for.

Firstly I quit my craptastic job after a second-level manager accused me of bullshitting. I proceeded to tell him that had I a hand full of bullshit it would most likely have come from his mouth in the first place and that I was highly tempted to place it back there – with replacement shit if necessary. The occasional “sir” thrown in for politeness of course.

Then in a humorous twist of the financial nipple I was almost immediately hired next door to help them start competing with the store I just quit. Yarrrr for no salary increase at all! (Perhaps I shouldn’t have answered honestly when they asked what I “was” getting paid)

Another question I’ve been asked a lot lately is about me inventing “z0r”. Yes.

Yes I did.

I invented “-eth” and more specifically “indeedeth” as well. Don’t want to believe me? Well neither do I, but I ran out of medication a while ago so that isn’t going to happen.

Now I’ve got a question for everyone who reads this, I’m contemplating that while I’m “between wacoms” (that is – waiting for someone to send me one, and or give me a really good plan for getting one in AFRICA, like maybe accepting donations for me on paypal and then mailing it to me) I’ll still update semi-regularly with pointless entries like this. Perhaps even go as far as post anime entries with (non) witty remarks underneath screen captions as SO MANY OTHER BLOGS do on a daily basis?

I DEMAND READER INPUT!

P.S.
I have a new hero (watch them)

My long absence has several reasons, the most important is that my Wacom (what I use to draw all this crap) has Parkinson disease. Basically this means my Wacom is going “on the fritz” and “jerking” about (and the only thing acceptable to jerk around me is my hand and –lackof- pants) while I try to draw….making things…..somewhat difficult.

Worst of all Wacoms aren’t sold here in AFRICA. The one I have was specially imported and “last of stock” from slightly after 1922. So what does this mean for the site? It means until I get a new wacom I won’t be updating often….or maybe even at all (aside from the occasional blurbs about my endless virginity we all love that is).

There is only one solution to this impending problem…..I shall give out my REAL mailing address in hopes some rich bugger (oh yes I know you’re out there Mr I-EARN-MORE-THAN-$3-AN-HOUR) shall mail me a new (preferably) WORKING Wacom tablet. Now….you might be tempted to send a bomb, you might even be tempted to send me underwear, while not as good as a new wacom this is an acceptable means of bribing/killing me.

So without further a due it’s:

P.O.BOX 728
Sunninghill
Johannesburg
South Africa
2157

Of course I’m not insane enough to think this’ll actually work, but considering paypal is an impossibility in Africa and that I really could use the underwe- I mean wacom, it’s certainly worth a try.

P.S.

Just spent the last hour deleting over 400 spam (which is precisely why I don’t give out my gmail addy here) email messages in my inbox, oh how I hate Jayde.com for defiling my inbox so. God may you strike down your hairy wrath upon its creator’s buttcrack so that they have endless troubles wiping poo away for enternity!!!!

P.P.S.

And for those of you who didn’t notice, I put a new comic upeth.